The handling of emotions is an emotional responsibility extremely essential in the life of the people. Sometimes emotions take the control on us, us exceed, us exceed; that is why the importance of knowing how to use them.
All emotions fulfill a significant function, they prepare us for a different class of reply; for example, the fear causes a rise of the heart beat that it does that it arrives more blood to muscles promoting the reply of alert; in the case of the sadness, the discouragement, the debility and the unselfishness that it characterise fulfill the function of leaving to go something that is no longer, that “it can no longer be”, something painful, etc., that is, us assistance to elaborate the mourning. Besides to give signals to the rest of them of that need its assistance.
Not all the people are also skillful when to express our emotions: ones result more clumsy or poor people, limiting us to say am good, ill, regular… In other cases, somatizamos the expression of which we feel with explanations of the style “have a lump in the throat ”, “have the stirred” stomach or “se me encoje the heart”…
The emotional regulation is the skills to use emotions of appropriate way. It supposes to take conscience of the relationship that it there is between which we feel (emotion), which we think (cognition, interpretation) and how react (behaviour).
It results fundamental conscious being of how the emotional state in which me meeting, at all times, is going to influence in my behaviour: because we always have the possibility of choosing what to do with the annoyance or with the penalty; we can shout, to anger us without control… or to search other ways of downloading the annoyance, for example, that they do not damage us nor to us nor to the rest of them.
This conscience takeover us will allow having a broad strategies repertoire of coping.
What steps have to give if we want to do a suitable management of our emotions?
- Identify, to take conscience of our emotions: involves be able to detect and to express which we feel, to identify what bodily sensations it accompany, etc. This is the first step, to know them; once I can appoint which I feel, will be able to know how to do him front.
- Accept and assimilate which I feel: we have to accept that emotions exist, that they are part of we, that we can not live regardless of them; since, also, us contribute a very valuable information. Therefore, results fundamental to give us permission to feel that emotion.
Once is able to elaborate these previous elements in my same, will be able to give the next step, of considering in the rest of them (to identify and to assimilate).
Starting from here it is necessary to do an exercise of autoconscience, with the aim of:
- Ponder and understand which we feel: it is significant strive to analyse what has done us feel in a certain way, that is what is which it is causing that emotion in me. This will be the only way of being able to search a solution to which it has caused it, and below to consider a way of using this emotion in a healthy way.
- Regular the emotion: search those mechanisms that they help us to manage them correctly, that is that they allow us to give a reply more adaptativa. In this way will achieve to integrate those emotions without exaggerating and adapting them to every situation.
The training in a suitable emotional management us assistance to maintain a great self-control; without self-control it is not possible to reach no aim in the life. For this is fundamental to blame us of our emotions at all times: of our joy, of our annoyance, etc. and of conducts that they accompany them.
Following the previous outline and being honest with regard to our emotions, will be able to contribute to our emotional development and strengthening.